Wednesday, December 14, 2011

a boost in esteem

My energy and overall self-esteem has been gradually building back up again, but I still have a ways to go.  I think until my tummy is flat and firm again I'll still struggle on my self-esteem.  My abs and shoulders were my favorite aspect of my body in how well they were defined so I would like to see them defined again.  

I'm also glad to find that I"m not as self conscious at the gym as when I first started going back, which is a huge relief.  That was such a crappy feeling.  I've also been consistent with going, which is helping that to.  

My eating habits are improving, I'm thankful to have some all good days and some mostly good days.  I still have a few bad day's mostly on weekends, as I still have yet to put together an eating plan that I actually stick to.  On my mostly good days it's not until the evening when I'm lounging in front of the TV eating endless amounts of Target brand plain animal crackers.  They are so very addicting so last night I put them away in my pantry cupboard so they're not lying next to my bed in plain sight with super easy access.
I'm also excited to have added a few new pieces to my workout wardrobe.  Some of my pants are more than 3 years old and they've been showing for the last year how old they are.  My favorite find is a pair of lululemon athletic yoga pants that I only paid $4 for and they are so comfy.  I've been wanting to buy something from lululemon, but they are out of my price range and they end in a size 12.  Though the funny thing is that these pants say size 10.  I'm totally aware that I'm no where near a size 10, but it gives me hope that I can buy clothing from there and it will actually fit.  I also picked up a pair of grey nike pants.  I was debating on buying them, because they were a little baggy in the front but when I reviewed the tag specials of the day they turned out to only be $1 and they went right into my cart with another hesitation.

Here's an updated picture of how long my hair is getting.

Though someday's I miss my short hairstyle.

I had started using a 8x11 3 subject notebook to log my eats and workouts in, but I quickly drew tired of lugging it around and not taking as nice of a pic as my little target notebook did, so today I've decided since I'm staring over, again, with my challenge I'm going to use a new notebook of my old version.  

Oh, yeah, almost forgot to mention that I'm not working this weekend.  I have a friends wedding up north on Saturday so I took the whole weekend off, which then allows me to attend service on Sunday.  It feels like an eternity since I've last been able to attend so I'm really excited to go and hear my pastor speak and see my friends.